Father Christmas accused of giving naughty children presents by Daily Mail

Daily Mail, defenders of "true British values", has today launched a scathing attack on Father Christmas, accusing him of wasting taxpayers' money on children that have been naughty this year.

An undercover report by fearless investigative journalists at the newspaper found that Father Christmas was changing the naughty list so that more children would get presents this year.

This kind gesture by the jolly old man, also known as St Nicholas, was seen as a deliberate waste of taxpayers money and not in line with the austerity measures introduced by the Coalition Government.

A columnist at the Daily Mail called Ima Racistbellend condemned the actions of Father Christmas, "This year has seen some of the naughtiest children come out in force to try and destroy this once great nation. Father Christmas needs to recognise this and respond appropriately by increasing the naughty list and making sure that children on this list know they will not be getting presents this year."

Prime Minister David Cameron was quick to criticise Father Christmas after the report, "The actions taken by Father Christmas do not support our fight against reckless spending and trying to cut costs after the financial mess of the previous government. Naughty children need to learn that if they behave badly then they will not be getting presents. Moreover Father Christmas should ensure it's harder for children to get on the good list to receive presents, as this will reduce costs for the UK taxpayer."

Father Christmas was unavailable for comment on the investigation as he was busy preparing from the festive season. However, the report comes at a bad time for the Lapland resident after several other newspaper articles into his private life have been made public this week.

This included a report by The Guardian which questioned his treatment of Rudolph the Reindeer and his refusal to take him to a vet despite his strange glowing nose and a BBC Panorama episode into the inappropriate working conditions of Elves.

More worryingly, another report in The Sun accused Father Christmas of paedophilic tendencies after it was found that he frequently emptied his sack close to children.

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