Harry Redknapp hired by RBS

Football manager Harry Redknapp has today been hired by the Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS) as their chief economic advisor.

The banking firm, which is 80% owned by the UK taxpayer, decided to make the move after Mr Redknapp managed to successfully communicate no knowledge or memory of his financial misdemeanors in his trial for tax evasion this past week.

The banking firm were also encouraged by Mr Redknapp's admission that he writes like a two year old, as this immediately gives him a huge advantage over many of the RBS's employees.

An RBS spokesperson says, "We are delighted to welcome Harry Redknapp onto the RBS team and feel he can really turn around the firm's fortunes. During the trial we have seen how Mr Redknapp skillfully avoided tax and feel this is something we can use to good effect at RBS."

"Moreover his popularity with Spurs fans, many of whom are members of the Jewish community, will mean he's popular with our bankers, lawyers and accountants, many of whom are members of the Jewish community."

However, the news that a football manager has been hired by the RBS has been received negatively by the UK taxpayer.

A spokesperson for the UK Taxpayer Alliance said, "The UK public is already disillusioned with RBS after employees at the company received record bonuses courtesy of the UK taxpayer, so hiring someone with no knowledge of the financial sector is an extreme oversight on their part."

Mr Redknapp is set to be paid over £1 million for his role as the RBS's financial advisor, with any extra bonuses being paid into a special account in the name of his pet dog.