Wig connoisseur Donald Trump is to be offered a job by The News of the World following false accusations directed towards President Barack Obama that he wasn't born in America.
The News of the World were said to be impressed at the way Mr Trump remained defiant and proud despite his claims being proved false and an utter load of shit.
The editor of the newspaper said, "We at the News of the World have faced a bit of a tough time recently after all that nasty phone hacking nonsense. Therefore, when our journalists make ridiculous accusations, we need to be sure they remain convinced that they're doing a great job and serving public interest rather than just wasting everyone's time."
Donald Trump is said to be cautious about the offer as he has more accusations to make about Barack Obama before he can consider moving on with his life.
Donald Trump said, "Barack Obama may have an American birth certificate, but we need to look further into this to prove it's not a fake. Other things Obama needs to prove include: whether he's a Muslim, socialist, transvestite, terrorist, if he actually went to College and, finally, if he hates white people."
News International has accepted Trump's stance and offered to hack the President's phone to find further things he could accuse Obama of being in his quest for truth and clarity.
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